Te Tai Poutini Polytechnic is receiving an additional $750 million funding from Minister Steven Joyce after changing its name to the South Western Motorway. Outgoing chief executive Paul Wilson said that once the polytechnic registered itself as a road of national significance (RONS) rather than a tertiary education institution it found that the government coffers were no longer locked.

Mr Wilson told Tertiary Update’s transport reporter Paki Taunuhia that the government expected Te Tai Poutini, as a road of national significance, to prove it was contributing to national economic growth and that it was helping people in the region to get to where they wanted to be faster than they would otherwise be able to.

“Well, we’ve been doing that for years, even before we changed from being a polytechnic to a road,” said Mr Wilson.

Transport Minister Steven Joyce welcomed the decision, noting that the government believes that the productivity and growth that come from roads such as Te Tai Poutini make the spending an investment rather than a cost.

Meanwhile Tertiary Education Minister Steven Joyce also welcomed the decision saying that there was too much duplication in the tertiary education system, so turning the polytechnic into a road not only gave the country a much needed new road, but it also eliminated one unnecessary polytechnic.

“This is the type of innovative thinking we would like to see other tertiary institutions consider,” Mr Joyce told Mr Paunuhia.

[pullquote]Footnote – there has been some confusion about the authenticity of this story.  For the sake of clarity TEU wishes to confirm that, yes, it is one of Tertiary Update’s occasional attempts at satire and that neither the chief executive of Te Tai Poutini or, nor the council of Te Tai Poutini had anything to do with the writing of this story. In particular, the quotes are fictional.[/pullquote]